During this Easter season, I’ve been reflecting on how the beauty and the joy of life is all the more profound when juxtaposed with the reality of sin and brokenness and suffering and death. And yet I think for me as an individual, as well as for me as a part of the larger Christian community and American culture, it can be uncomfortable and challenging to let myself acknowledge and sit in the reality of said sin and brokenness and suffering and death instead of just focusing on – or trying to look like I’m focusing on – only the positive. But I think failing to acknowledge the reality of the complex intermingling of emotions ranging from joy to sorrow as part of being human actually prevents me from truly experiencing fullness of life – in relationship with Jesus, in relationship with others, and even in relationship with myself.
The reason I think this is that, as much as I wish this weren’t the case, neither I nor anyone else I have ever met is perfect. And, we all live in an imperfect world. Which means that while there is kindness and love and beauty and joy in life, the reality of pain and things being less than they ought to be is all too evident. I might choose to try to ignore these painful realities, but if I do, I believe I actually am hurting myself and others because I am failing to give these things over to Jesus, repent and make changes where I can, have honest conversations with others, and work to do what I can to support change and justice in the world around me, including in everyday relationships. When I insist that everything is “fine”, I am actually contributing to things becoming even less fine.
And yet I’ve been realizing that this need to acknowledge brokenness and the difficulty in doing so leaves me in quite an uncomfortable position much of the time. I am the type of person that likes to try my best; that wants to be vulnerable but is afraid of making mistakes, being rejected, or being judged; that really wishes that I and everyone around me could just be perfect so that I could honestly say everything is indeed fine instead of only smiling and pretending it is. But while I may try to put on a brave face, I know this is impossible. And desperately trying to create and maintain a façade of perfectionism is ultimately exhausting and soul crushing and leads to a very shallow, hollow, and empty way of life, as I can personally attest to. This way of living sucks the life out of the individual, but also out of relationships and community.
In contrast, striving to be honest, authentic, vulnerable, and humble is simultaneously terrifying and breathtakingly beautiful and freeing. This is something I wrestle with and often fall short of daily, yet something I also think I have been becoming more intentional in and, by God’s grace, in which I am slowly growing. To be imperfect and yet to be loved is a beautiful thing – and this is something that we all can experience in Jesus as well as in relationships with loved ones. And this seems especially fitting to reflect upon at Easter time, the season in which we acknowledge that our individual and corporate sin is so serious and grave that justice can only be obtained by the grave. No matter how “perfect” we may try to look on the outside, all of our relationships, be it with God or with fellow human beings, are bound to entail brokenness, hurt, and pain. None of us can stand before a holy God, none of us can be in relationship with him by our own merit, none of us can even prevent ourselves from hurting those we love most dearly in some way or another.
And yet, JESUS! Through his sacrifice on the cross, Jesus, who was indeed perfect, died the death that I and everyone else deserves in order to bring about true justice and the possibility of true relationship. And the grave could not hold him! If we trust in Jesus for salvation, death will also not ultimately hold us, for someday we have hope of eternal life with Jesus in a world where we are fully sanctified and all has been made right. The power of sin and brokenness and pain and suffering has been and will continue to be overcome in Jesus, so I no longer need to fear being honest about present painful realities. To me, hope of living in a world where all will truly be made right someday and in which we even get glimpses of growth and restoration now when we authentically engage in relationship with Jesus and others and self is far better than the alternative of instead living in a shadow world in which I am merely pretending to believe that things are fine enough while in reality brokenness prevails around me.
It is my prayer that the hope I have in Jesus and the life he has made possible will give me the courage to continue to try to be honest and vulnerable in how I approach myself, others, and the world around me, so that I can experience growth and change now while looking forward to the promise of fully perfected sanctification, restoration, and reconciliation that Jesus will bring when he comes again.
May we acknowledge the painful reality of sin and brokenness and suffering and death so that we may be able to receive and celebrate and live the true life that Jesus our Savior made possible when he died for us and then rose again. He is risen! He is risen indeed! And in him we truly may live.
Romans 5 English Standard Version (ESV)
Peace with God Through Faith
5 Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. 3 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
6 For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. 7 For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— 8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. 9 Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God. 10 For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life.11 More than that, we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.