This past week marked a significant milestone in my professional life – I finally completed my clinical hours and can apply for full licensure as a marriage and family therapist. My husband so sweetly marked this occasion with having a little surprise celebration ready for me upon my return from work. But truly, I think instead of celebrating me, we were and are really celebrating “we”.
I used to have a very individualistic understanding of life, including in how I took pride in “my” work and “my” efforts and “my” accomplishments. I felt as though “my” time was just that – mine – and that how I chose to spend it and what impact these choices had was largely my own business. Looking back, I realize that truly time and accomplishments were never really only my own – every moment is a gift from the LORD, as are any talents or resources that I may have. And from the time I was small what I did was only made possible by the love and support of family and friends. Yet I often failed to realize my need of others, and became overly focused on my ability to choose and to do.
Just how much of an illusion the idea of “my” time and efforts and accomplishments is – and really always was – has become evident to me in such tangible ways since becoming married and linking my life to that of my husband’s, and even more so since having a baby. With each day that passes, I realize increasingly clearly that whatever I do requires sacrifice and means that I am not doing something else – and that this has large implications for those closest to me, especially my husband and toddler. Motherhood is also incredibly humbling, in that I realize quickly and often the limits of my own capabilities and energies and efforts, and repeatedly learn that I can really only “accomplish” anything with the support of loved ones and by grace of God.
I am so grateful I have a husband who loves me so well and so generously, and a toddler who has been so flexible. The completion of my licensure hours is all the more meaningful to me since it is such a tangible reminder of all of the love and care and support of those I love most dearly – my husband and toddler as well as so many other family members, friends, teachers, mentors, and supervisors. I am so thankful my husband and I can celebrate this milestone together while continuing to be on this adventure of life with one another and striving to love one another well. As I believe is true in most of life, I find accomplishment is sweetest when shared and made possible in the context of meaningful relationship.