Some of the many qualities I love about my husband – and that I treasure getting to see in new ways now that he is a father – include his ability to be present and unexpectedly humorous in such a way that the everyday, and even mundane, can be transformed into something special. I remember admiring this quality in him even back when we were merely dating – a specific memory that especially stands out is from a time in college when we were serving in a children’s ministry event overseas. We had been entrusted with babysitting several toddlers; it was toward the end of a busy day, and both toys and energy were running low. I was trying to do the best I could to keep the kids engaged but felt myself quickly running out of ideas and wondering how long was left until parents returned. My ability to be present was surely fading. Then in came my husband (or rather, at that time, boyfriend) – and in what to me seemed a nearly effortless blink of an eye, he was here and there about the room captivating the children with a number of unexpected, whimsical, and humorous interactions. Soon the previously dull and sleepy room was filled with the brightness of joy and connection fostered by laughter and play. And I distinctly remember admiring how he interacted with these children so intentionally, and hoping that I could grow in my ability to both be responsible but also to connect and make room for being more lighthearted and playful.
On Father’s Day I was reminded that – while neither of us are carefree college students anymore – my husband’s ability to be playfully present and my admiration of him being able to do so are still just as true as ever. If anything, I value and respect how he does so even more, as I know it takes intentionality and quiet strength to continue to foster these qualities amidst the very real weight of responsibility that comes with being a father and a husband and an employee and a leader and…the list of the many roles he fills could go on. On Father’s Day, we had both a sweet day filled with small adventures as a family and yet also a tiring day (especially after a much-needed and anticipated afternoon nap was skipped by our over-excited baby, leaving us little time to complete some necessary household tasks). By the time bath-time rolled around, our baby was quite worn out, and so were we. But instead of rushing through the nightly bedtime routine by dividing and conquering, my husband and I decided to join in giving our baby a bath together. My husband likes to use the phone to play bath-time songs for our baby, but as we forgot the phone downstairs, we began to make up our own songs – using Sesame Street’s classic “Rubber Duckie” as an inspiration. We took turns creating silly, nonsensical, spontaneous verses – some of which rhymed and some of which decidedly did not, and some of which were sung in tune and some of which were quite “free-spirited” – and soon found that my husband and I along with our baby were laughing and smiling, joyful and connected in our play even while also going through the motions of bath-time scrubbing and splashing and rinsing and “(pa)jamming”. And what better way to wrap up my husband’s very first Father’s Day than being together, as a little family of three, finding something special and delightful and full of joy in the simple, everyday experience of a bedtime routine? I hope that as our baby grows he will become increasingly intentional, playful, connected, and present in the everyday…just like his daddy.